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Red Flags To Look For in A Relationship

By on 2021-11-09 16:02:27, 0 Comments

Red flags to look for in a relationship

People usually talk about the red flags in a relationship so they can avoid toxic and abusive partners. But what does this term mean and are these the same for everyone? Is seeing a red flag a sign that you should walk away from the relationship right away or is there room for the other individual to grow and mature? 

These are just some of the things we’ll be talking about in this article. So if you are looking for red flags in men or girlfriend red flags, you’ll know what to be aware of. 


What Are Red Flags in a Relationship?

Before anything, let’s discuss the term “red flag.” 

Given any circumstance, the term refers to a warning or a reason to stop. In games, a red flag is used to stop a game because of a foul. And even on a race car track, a red flag is used to let drivers know that the conditions are too dangerous to drive on the road. In a way, these are things that apply to a relationship too. 

Why Is It Called a Red Flag?

Seeing a red flag in your relationship is an indication that you shouldn’t be with that individual. If you continue the relationship, you’ll most likely have an unhealthy relationship that could be emotionally dangerous for either person. This is why it’s important to be on the lookout for relationship red flags, especially when you’re just getting to know your partner. 

Are Yellow Flags Okay?

Apart from keeping an eye out for a red flag, it’s also good to be on the lookout for yellow flags. Unlike the former, a yellow flag is less severe and can simply be used as a reminder to slow things down. They are often used to address an individual’s wants and needs instead of more universal concerns. 

So if your partner has a problem expressing his emotions but is aware and working on it, that is a yellow flag. A red flag in this example is when he is in denial of his problem and forces that you’re the one with a problem. 


How to Find Red Flags in a Relationship 

For someone with no background in analyzing people, finding red flags in a person is not that easy. That is why we recommend using a public search engine like Kiwi Searches, to do research on a person. Since these things are not too clear, it can be difficult to fully realize that you are facing red flags warning. And for some people, it can take a while before a red flag can be present in a relationship. You need to really pay attention and learn to admit when that your partner has a red flag you need to be concerned about. 

One way you can realize that there are relationship red flags is when you experience these things:

You Justify Their Behavior

When you are often justifying their bad behavior, especially to your family and friends, it can be a red flag indicator. Especially if you find yourself always having to explain his behavior, you may need to step back from the relationship for a bit and assess the evidence in front of you. 

They Avoid Talking About Their Issues

You should also check to see if your partner is the type to talk about any issues in your relationship. If your partner is not willing to talk through issues, no matter how big or small they may be, it is something you need to be attentive to.

They Constantly Test Your Loyalty

Another red flag that you should try to find is when that person is constantly testing your boundaries. A healthy relationship is one where you both respect each other’s decisions. If your partner doesn’t, it could be a sign that the relationship will not work. 

It Just Feels Wrong

Do you ever get the feeling that something is wrong? 

Sometimes, it’s important to listen to your intuition and gut. If you have a nagging feeling that something is wrong and that things aren’t making sense, trust that feeling. You’ll thank yourself later, especially if you were able to dodge a bullet in the relationship. 


Common Red Flags in a Relationship

How to find red flags in a relationship 

Here are some of the warning signs that you should keep an eye on:

Bouts of Violence

If a partner exhibits episodes of violence towards you, strangers, animals, or other loved ones, that is something you should be worried about. It usually means that they are unable to channel their emotions in a healthy and proper manner. 


Another common item on the red flags relationship list is jealousy and distrust. It simply means that you have an insecure partner. He could persistently come across your relationships, especially with members of the opposite sex. If he can’t trust you, then why should you?

Crazy Exes

If your partner is fond of referring to his exes as crazy, it could be part of the relationship red flag list that should warn you. Is it possible that he was the crazy ex in his previous relationships? Anyway, if he refers to his exes as crazy, it shows that he lacks respect for the people he once loved and cared for. 


Being controlling is part of the red flags in relationships that will help you realize things. If your partner is controlling you, it means that he has deep personal issues that he needs to work on. Make sure you rethink your relationship and how it will play out in the future. 

Alcoholism and Substance Abuse

While there’s nothing wrong with drinking on occasions, drinking every day or until inebriated is another red flag dating tip to look out for. And if your partner is reliant on drugs, you should be warned about that. 

If these things are affecting your partner’s life negatively, it is a sign of addiction. You need to be careful with this as you could be put in danger in the future. 


What to do if You Notice Red Flags Within Your Relationship

Red flags in a relationship

If you start to notice these red flags in relationships, you need to know what to do. Although everyone is not perfect, you have to be careful that these don’t become red flags in a marriage

Seeing your partner’s flaws may not necessarily mean that you have to break up, it just means that you have to keep an eye out for repeated mistakes due to their behavior. You should also remember to do these things when you start noticing these red flags:

Talk to Your Partner

If your partner is open to talking about his issues and is willing to change, that is a good sign that he is improving himself. He is ready to be serious with you and not let his past mistakes be the reason you two break up.

Know Your Boundaries

Meanwhile, if your partner is defensive and aggressive about his flaws, it can mean that he is not ready to change and accept them. The important thing is that you know your boundaries and when you will be willing to let go of your relationship. 

Don’t Be Manipulated

Sometimes, toxic partners manipulate the other person they are in a relationship with. They pretend that they are working through their issues but in reality, they are just suppressing their behaviors. And when an incident calls for him to blow up, he could lose his cool. 

Talk to a Counselor

Accepting your partner’s flaws is the first thing you can do to help your partner. It is also a good way you can set your boundaries and learn when to say goodbye. When things get tough, though, you need the help of a counselor to get you through the difficult process. Find a Therapists near you and talk to one to express your concerns. 

Remember, guilt is never a reason to stay in an abusive and toxic relationship. Don’t let your partner guilt you into staying. 

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